Well, I had my doctor's appointment today. It wasn't a great visit, I really feel like it was just a smash-and-grab affair - smash the heart monitor on my belly, grab my vitals and run. To his defense though, he did have a woman delivering and he could have chosen not to see me at all because of it.
But, because it was smash-and-grab, we didn't get to talk about my birth plan. In fact, I don't think he's interested in talking about it at all. He admitted that despite the fact that he's had it for a week - he didn't read it and likely wouldn't - so I shouldn't even bother making another appointment for that purpose. I tried to go over my really important points, but it was a lost cause as he just kept going into stories about other patients. Oh? Some 4 ft nothing woman had a 5 lb baby and still tore? What does that have anything to do with me not wanting internal fetal monitoring? Oh? Women who put, "I don't want a c-section" on their birth plans are just asking for c-sections huh? How very comforting. I shouldn't be concerned about your use of Cytotec just because you haven't needed to use it in well over a year? That puts my mind at ease!
I'm so frustrated. If I had any other option I think I'd take it right now. The whole time I just wanted to say, "Can you stop talking for a moment so I can ask you my questions?" I've found some doulas in our area and I've emailed a few asking if they're even available - so I'll wait to hear back from them. However, I still don't know if we can afford the cost - plus what are they going to do if my doctor will hardly shut up for a minute and listen to ME?
On a side note, I got to see a placenta at our Bradley Class on Tuesday. It was a bit horrific and I've decided that I'm not one of those mothers who want to see/keep it afterward just as I'm not one that wants to feel the baby's head as it's pushing through.